Life this week

It's Spring break and we're having a solid week.  I'm having to sneak downstairs early this morning to write this, though.  That means I'm busy parenting.  Me + Girls = All Week Long.  And when the girls are playing during the day, I can't open the computer for long.  They come running....Eloise wants to type letters and spell words and Cordelia wants to destroy the keyboard, like any healthy 17 month old.

We are declaring this spring and summer the seasons of the bike.  The girls love the bike trailer, so Alex and I suit up and take the girls for a ride.  The only challenge is finding a route that is not too hilly (we're still biking wimps) or dangerous (I hate traffic in my car, definitely not braving it on my bike.)  I think our route to Dunkin Donuts is working out well for us.  :-)

It's Holy Week.  And we are preparing to celebrate the death (Good Friday) and resurrection (Easter) of Jesus.  This is the most important time of year for the church because this is what it's all about.  Jesus died for us.  For 3 days.  Then we rose again.  It is also a very full week and weekend for Alex.

So, to occupy my time in the evenings, I've started a photography blogsite trial.  Wow.  It is fun, tricky to learn, and full of choices.  But seeing my images full screen on a fading slideshow is pumpin' me up.  I'm eager to start my business but there is also still a lot to do before I can.  So I'm plugging away.  This week I hope to accomplish the following towards that goal-- buy a new computer screen, improve at another practice session, and open a business bank account.  I'm working hard but having fun and praying that I'm doing the right thing.

Here are 3 more from my last session.  I'm loving these sisters' eyes.

And one more.  Our favorite "woof woof" friend.  Cordelia hearts animals.  We are destined to get one in the future, and when we do, I want a Puggle.  Pug+Beagle=Puggle.

I took some shots of "woof woof" real fast one afternoon.  Uploaded them, edited my 4 favorite and emailed them to my neighbor.  They loved them.  My heart swelled.  Sharing beautiful images of a loved one is such a blessing to the receiver and the giver.  And that's why I'm enjoying my photography internship so much.

A weekend and a pastor wife

Our weekend started in earnest at noon on Friday after Alex finished a funeral and Eloise was home from school.  It was off to a great start until about 3:30 when the power went out.  No shocker here.  Considering it has gone out 4 times this month--3 nights during the snow storm, an afternoon a couple of weeks ago, a 4am stint last week, and now Friday night.

I knew it was going to go out.  Maybe it had to do with the large limb laying on our power line and the predicted 60mph winds.  But it doesn't really matter how I knew, I just knew.  It was going to go out.

And it did.  So we headed out for dinner, some errands.  We brought home some fire wood and a large bottle of wine.  We were going to make the best of it.

And it was a fun family indoor camping expedition.  Fun because the power came back on at 9:30.  PTL.  (Praise the Lord!)  So we had heat again and our groceries (and money) were spared.

Saturday we enjoyed chocolate chip pancakes, a second hike in the woods, a trip to the farmers market where we bought Girl Scout Cookies--ironic, yes, and some game playing time with Eloise while Cordelia napped.  A sitter came and off Alex and I went to a church couples dinner.  It was huge and awesome and the week as a pastor and pastor wife began again.

I had an interesting encounter this week as a pastor wife.  Most weeks go by and I don't notice that I'm a PW, but from time to time, I remember very well.  A met a woman for the first time.  I introduced myself and gave her some background information about me as we met.  When she pieced together that I was Alex's wife, her gut said out loud to me, "oh no, I'm so embarrassed.  I've got to be really good now..."

Then my gut said out loud, "No you don't.  Please don't think that.  I'm normal too."

And that's how the interaction went.  From there, we connected and laughed and forged a little friendship, and our interesting beginning was forgotten....I hope.

I actually enjoy people who are a little late or say something silly or inappropriate because then I know they are normal.  They are in touch with their downfalls.  I can relate to them. 

It's the people who live in a realm of perfection that I have trouble connecting with most.

The lesson to me--Be real.  Be candid about my imperfections.  And be extra gracious because some people are scared of pastors and their wives because they feel judged.  And that's really sad... not only for them but also for me.  Because if people feel afraid of me, they won't be my friend.  And I really love having friends.  

Now, let's hope True Grit wins best cinematography tonight.  And let's have a great Monday.  What do you say?

Portraits and Priest Things

Yesterday we adventured downtown to enjoy some art.  And boy did we enjoy some art!  There is a British photography exhibit right now from the 1860s.  It is amazing how incredible these photos are 150 years later.  And did you know that the camera was invented in 1839?

These two ladies really caught my eye.  I loved them.

Who painted this?  I can't remember!  Please tell me.  Isn't she stunning?

Pablo Picasso painted this beauty.  I love Picasso.  I love these colors.

And finally, yes this is a very terse entry because I shouldn't be sitting here when I have 10 things I need to be doing, if you came to our house, would this surprise you?

What if the collars were hooked and the oval was more clear (like they are in our bedroom)?

Answer:  They are priest collars.  And we have them scattered all around our house.

I've had the pleasure of spending some time with new friends who do not attend our church.  This is rare.  Everyone I know here falls in 3 categories: church friends, neighbors, school friends.  But this week, I've encountered some un-churchy people (which is so refreshing for this pastor wife).  And as I was cleaning the house today, I wondered, "did they notice the collars scattered across the house? do they thing we're crazy?  this is not normal..."

But I think they liked me anyway.  I really really do so it must not have freaked them out too much.  Or, this just didn't notice.

Pause and Reflect

I didn't think I had very much to say.  Nothing really noteworthy to share.  I have some photos but they aren't much different from previous photos on this blog.  A cutie Cordelia and an Eloise painting. Just life going as usual.

But I thought to myself, I need to post on the blog.  And that got me thinking and reflecting on the past couple of days.  As my friend smartly pointed out, I'm an introvert.  I don't process externally, instead I think in my head.  In fact, a word hardly escapes my mouth without being adequately considered in my mind first.  That's just the way I am.

The blog helps me reflect.

 

So here's my reflection.

Life as a pastor:  We returned home on Tuesday.  Walked in the door at 2pm.  Alex showered and was out the door at 3pm.  He had a funeral at 4pm.  He then did the burial the next morning and another funeral that afternoon.  His schedule is packed this weekend.  Alex hit the ground running.  So I hit the ground running too.  And it's okay because I'm not stressed out because we had an excellent escape to Texas and were spoiled rotten.  I'm refreshed and ready to go...I hope this lasts a while...  :-)

And I love nap time.  I didn't get it yesterday because we had a plumber here for 3 hours.  That's a long and noisy time.  No napping when the plumber is here.

Even though Eloise doesn't nap anymore, my arms and back need a break from our almost 14 month old.  Eloise can do her big girl things alone and I can do mine.  I get to blog and check Facebook and edit photos and recharge.

Thanksgiving Eve Eve

I'm walking lopsided tonight.  And my back needs to be cracked because this little girl was riding my hip all day.  I even brought out my Moby wrap this afternoon to help me carry the load.  She's sick again.  Just running a fever and is highly irritable.

Poor girl.  And my poor, poor back.

(I took these photos yesterday.  A happier day for little Cordelia.)

So I have a major crick in my neck from doing everything with one hand today, and the holidays have been on my mind, appropriately since it's Thanksgiving Eve Eve.  And I'm nostalgic just like everyone else.  

We'll be here for Thanksgiving and Christmas.  No traveling because Alex is doing the Thanksgiving Day service as well as a service on Saturday.  He'll obviously be working on Christmas as well--Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and the day after Christmas (it's a Sunday).

I remember in Vail how the entire local church "worked" on Christmas Eve.  Our church hosted 4 HUGE Christmas Eve services.  The 4pm Beaver Creek service was especially popular because President Ford would attend each year when he was in good health.  People literally sit on the floor for that service.  Hundreds of people in a relatively small chapel to celebrate Christmas and/or see President Ford.  And it took our entire congregation to serve at the 4 services--ushers, readers, greeters, musicians. It was fun because we were all in it together, and we all ate a cheap Chinese restaurant between the services together too.

I remember our first Christmas away from home vividly.  It was Alex's first year on the job and our first year not to visit our families for the holiday.  The kindest family invited us to their house for Christmas supper.  It was the most lovely evening with warmth and cheer shared with their family and several other "strays" for the holiday.  One young man, a vibrant South African Christian man was there as well.  We really enjoyed his funny stories of working on the ski mountain and hearing about the Bible study he started in his apartment complex.  That first Christmas on our own was difficult for me, well honestly they are all difficult for me, but being included in such an intimate family celebration was very touching.

Through the years we've been graciously invited to so many loving homes.  And I'm more than thankful for all the kind invitations.  This year for Thanksgiving we will share our meal with my dear old friend Jen and her extended family.  What a blessing to be with my dearest friend while we're away from our loved ones.

Of course, now we're growing into our own family.  Two kids will do that to you pretty fast!  And we're starting our own traditions.  I find that when I get overly nostolgic and lonely this time of year, empty days only make it worse.  So I start to plan and surround myself with friends.  

Last year we hosted a "Working Orphans Supper" for all the church employees and volunteers that work all the Christmas Eve services.  They host a service, come over for supper for about 45 minutes, and then quickly head back to prepare for the next service.  They literally eat and run.  I didn't even speak with everyone last year.  And I plan on doing it again.  Because 1) I have to eat dinner anyway 2) the idea of them not eating Christmas Eve dinner is depressing to me 3) I don't have to sit home alone 4) they compliment me on my food and that makes me feel SO good.

It's a complicated balance for clergy people and their families.  The holidays are a fantastic celebration of God.  The church is full of life and people and good news.  But for those behind the scenes, there's still an undercurrent of work involved.  I can't speak for all pastor wives because I know there are some very holy ones out there :-), but for me, it's an emotionally complicated time of year.

Happy Thanksgiving, Y'all!

(I hear I'm going to be having some fried turkey on Thursday.  Yum!  And, Go Cowboys!)

Hilarious.

For your Sunday Eve laugh, watch this.  It's only 26 seconds.  It won't disappoint.  And it perfectly depicts our lives as a clergy family.

Hahahahahahahahaha!

Eloise and I have watched this video almost 20 times.

Build it and they will come

Last Sautrday, when I visited another church's Christmas bazaar, I sat and had lunch with the co-chairs of the event.  I introduced myself and we shared about our churches.  We shared about how they are shells of what they once were and/or have the potential to be.  They noted how terrible their parking situations is.  If only we had better parking people would come, they lamented.

Blame in on the rain, yeah yeah!  I started singing to myself.

Before I go any further with my thought process, I will stop and recongize that yes, having a difficult parking situation can be a challenge to church growth.  Buildings, expensive land, no available land, no parking, terrible location are all challenges to churches indeed.  There are also lots of logistical challenges especially for the elderly, the very young, and the disabled.

There are also lots of lame and not so lame excuses for not going to church.  Some lame excuses that cross my mind every Saturday night: I'm tired.  I don't want to walk a block.  I don't feel well.  I don't really want to see that person there.  I have to get up and out of the house with everyone dressed and be there on time.   Okay, that one is so not lame.  Totally legit.  I'd much rather be training for a marathon.  Oh no, never mind.  I'd much rather be blogging.  Oh yes, that's me.


Some more valid than others.  This is really not a GO TO CHURCH essay.  It's really a WHAT BRINGS PEOPLE TO CHURCH? essay.  It's a WHY GO TO CHURCH essay.  It's a WHY DO I GO TO CHURCH essay.

I don't go to church because I have a parking spot.  Would be nice, wouldn't it?  But all the staff and clergy parking is gone.  And I'm not really staff or clergy anyway, so no, I don't have a spot.  I don't go to church because I'm paid.  Nope, not paid.  I don't go to church because it's cool.  It's only still cool in the South.

I go to church because of that wild card experience I get (almost) every time.  The inexplicable feeling I get when I enter worship with a group of people.  It's the Holy Spirit.  Somehow my cup is filled.  My belly is satisfied.  God uses the Holy Spirit to touch me in some intangible way.

The connections I get with the congregation also keep me coming back.  It's the homeless person lined up behind a law partner for communion that touches me.  It's the family of 3 coming up for communion.  The family of 3 that shouldn't be 3, but with a miracle from God that baby is alive.  It's the intergenerational friendships that touch me in a way the "real world" can't.

Parking doesn't bring me to church.  I think about how we paid big bucks to park half a mile from Texas Stadium and thought that was a good parking situation.  I think of the homeless men and women who walked across a cold city to come to Shepherd's Heart, our church in Pittsburgh.

Blaming parking is a distraction from some real reasons people don't go to church.


Is love and forgiveness being communicated at church?  Is the Good News being preached?  Are we a warm, friendly environment that helps people know God and know each other?

I don't know.  Are we?  Am I?

These are the questions that I want to ask myself instead of worrying about parking or comfortable chairs or something else.  Because these won't bring people to church (movie theaters have great chairs and big parking lots!), but the nourishment of God will.

The Pastor's Wife

Today, as I am everyday really, I am a pastor's wife.  The ultimate church volunteer.  The church lady that knows where the vacuum is, where the coffee mugs go, and can lock-up after an event.

It doesn't make me special.  You can do all these things too.  Hint, hint.  Wink, wink.  It's just a description of what I do, and probably many pastor's wives do, every week.

I love this role.  (On most days :-)

Here's what I did this week as a pastor's wife.

1.  Made some yummy banana bread and attended our mother's Bible study.

2.  Traded loads, literally loads, of emails concerning Meals for Moms, scheduling, retreat info, etc.

3.  Took photos of some new (and not so new) staff members for the welcome board.

4.  Hosted a preschool welcome party at the church's preschool.  I'm still tired from it.  Yawn.

5.  I let Eloise pretend to be a bride and walk down the aisle with an empty church.  She asked where her prince was.  I said I didn't know.

6.  I printed and posted the photos of the new (and not so new) staff members for the member board.

7.  I admired and thought about our stained glass window that has Robert E. Lee and George Washington sitting together.  And I wondered a lot about it.  I still do, really.

8.  I was welcomed.  That's a passive thing.  I didn't really do anything but stand there and be confused.  We've been here for 2 years.  Where's she been for 2 years?  At least she was nice and welcomed us to the church.  (That doesn't always happen, you know.)

9.  Finally, I'm planning (I will do this tonight) for Kid's Church tomorrow.  Yippee!

Now go forth, and volunteer at your church today!!

The Pastor's Wife

Being a stay at home mom with a pastor for a husband means being frugal.   And nothing says frugal quite like canning, especially when I can with Christmas in mind.  And canning on a Sunday afternoon really brings it home.

I am undoubtedly a PASTOR'S WIFE.

Yikes!

Today I made Dilly Beans.  Or, Pickled Green Beans.  Delicious.

What did you do with your Sunday?

I hope it was an awesome day for you.

Life as a ...

"Life as a Priest"

or

"Life as a Dad"

or

"Life"

Life as a Priest

People often ask Alex what he does all week.  I mean, other than Sunday mornings, what else is there to do?

Well let me tell you.

Today, Saturday mind you, Alex visited 4 new little babies and 3 sets of parents in the hospital before he performed a lengthy Nigerian wedding.  

All in a days work.

And what do I do when my husband works all day Saturday?  I eat donuts, go to the zoo, fix lunch, clean-up lunch, hug my girls, push Eloise on the bike while pushing Cordelia in the stroller (that takes talent, folks), kick the ball, pretend to be a monster, fix dinner, kiss my husband as he walks in the door at 5:30, head to the hardware store to get mouse traps, canning goods, among other things, head the grocery store, come home to help put the girls to sleep, clean the house, blog, and then (as soon as I move my rear that stuck to this chair) I will start preparing the lunch for your Young Adult luncheon that's happening here tomorrow after church.

All in a days work.

When I Really Feel like a PW

A PW is a "pastor's wife" just like a PK is a "pastor's kid" and a P can stand for pastor.  A PW, a P, and 2 PKs.  That is who we are.

But we don't feel that way most of the year...say 310 days out of the year.  It's the other 55 days that we do feel it, though.  And ladies and gents, we feel that way right now.

It's no different than all those accountants working long hours right now.  Or medical residents sleeping at the hospital.  Or the lawyers that put in 90 hours a week.  I know all professions have ups and downs and busy seasons.

Our's just happen to be right now.  I'm hoping you can guess why, if not, you haven't been attending Eloise's ballet class.

Yesterday at ballet, the teacher who we ADORE, combined the Snow White story with the Easter bunny.  Interesting, yes.  Hilarious, yes.  Confusing to a 3 year old, most definitely yes.

That's right, the Easter bunny is coming....Yes, but No.  What I really mean is that Jesus is coming.  He came at Christmas, really, now he's making his way through the Gospel teaching and healing and loving people.  Soon he'll march into the Passion scene, die a gruesome death willingly for us all.  Then triumph over the grave.  Then, we can say "Alleluia" aloud again!  (In our tradition we don't say Alleluia during the Lent season until Easter--symbolic and beautiful.)

And that is why we are a P family right now.  Same thing happens at Christmas.  Alex works especially hard at this time leaving the PW and the PKs to fend for ourselves.  So, I got to get on that.  On that fending part.

Happy Easter season to you all.  I hope it's full of the knowledge of Christ's sacrifice for us all.